past horrors

This photo was taken in Tagaytay for a December respite :)

Recently, I have this urge to visit Macgregor to be alone, to create one solitary pursuit I could offer to myself.  But the truth is, I must ascertain things to just slip away from guilt. I don't need  silent dwellings on the hopes of justifying mistakes. I'm not blaming myself, I actually just wanna think that it was my fault. And I can't get over it. 

 I sometimes feel that I have to neglect the echoes resounding in my ears. I need to think. I need to escape. I need to feel better. 

My past is always haunting me. Just like this photo, it could be so beautiful but when you try to look back, it only creates fear. 

By the way, I paid another expensive coffee here in Macgregor.